GLaDOS voice lines

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This is a complete list of GLaDOS' voice lines from Portal and Portal 2.

Portal

See also: Portal

Test Chambers 00-02


If the player manages to take a cube into the material emancipation grill while the door is open


Receiving the Handheld Portal Device

See also: Handheld Portal Device

Test Chambers 03-04


Test Chambers 05-08




Test Chambers 09-11

During the level:



Upgrading the Handheld Portal Device


Test Chambers 12-16




If the player is trapped in the High Energy Pellet receptor area


Test Chamber 17


Test Chamber 18

If a Storage Cube is lost in the goo at the bottom

If the player is trapped in the High Energy Pellet receptor area


Test Chamber 19



During escape









On destroying a security camera

Final battle

When the player picks up the morality core


First core destroyed

"[The voice has subtly changed. Smoother, more seductive, less computerized]"

The following automatically plays or repeats after the respective speech for every destroyed core.


Second core destroyed


Third core destroyed



Unused lines/alternate delivery


In regular computer voice; versions with the deeper voice are used in the final game.


Portal 2

See also: Portal 2

Single-player lines

Chapter 1: The Courtesy Call

GLaDOS Reawakening

Incinerator/Portal Gun

Chapter 2: The Cold Boot

GLaDOS Test Chamber 1

GLaDOS Test Chamber 2

GLaDOS Test Chamber 3

GLaDOS Test Chamber 4

GLaDOS Test Chamber 5

GLaDOS Test Chamber 6



If the player picks up a trash item


GLaDOS Test Chamber 7





If the player manages to take the Wheatley Easter Egg and tries to take it to the exit


If the player takes the Companion Cube past the exit

GLaDOS Test Chamber 8

Chapter 3: The Return

GLaDOS Test Chamber 9

GLaDOS Test Chamber 10

GLaDOS Test Chamber 11

GLaDOS Test Chamber 12

GLaDOS Test Chamber 13

GLaDOS Test Chamber 14

GLaDOS Test Chamber 15

GLaDOS Test Chamber 16

GLaDOS Test Chamber 17

Chapter 4: The Surprise

GLaDOS Test Chamber 18

GLaDOS Test Chamber 19

GLaDOS Test Chamber 20

GLaDOS Test Chamber 21/Escape from GLaDOS

Chapter 5: The Escape

GLaDOS' Chamber

If GLaDOS uses hidden panels to knock the player back into the chamber


Chapter 6: The Fall

The Fall

Old Aperture Office bird nest

Chapter 7: The Reunion

First Propulsion Gel Test Chamber

Second Propulsion Gel Test Chamber

End of Propulsion Gel testing

After first Conversion Gel encounter

Cave Johnson Lemon Speech

Test after Lemon Speech

Gel connection area

Chapter 8: The Itch

Frankenturrets

Wheatley Test Chamber 1

Wheatley Test Chamber 2

Wheatley Test Chamber 3

Wheatley Test Chamber 4

Wheatley Test Chamber 5

Wheatley Test Chamber 6

Wheatley Test Chamber 11

Wheatley Test Chamber 12

Wheatley Test Chamber 15

Wheatley Test Chamber 16

Chapter 9: The Part Where He Kills You

Wheatley Test Chamber 12/The trap

That Part

Turret Trap

Bombs intro

Pre-lair

Corrupted Cores

Pre-final battle

Final Battle

Stalemate Button

Space

Ending lines

Co-op lines



Upon completion of Course 4, chamber 01:

Upon completion of Course 4, chamber 02:




Upon completion of a final level in a course













While destroying turrets in course 1






Upon first-time-unlocking of course 5




















Course 4 chamber 3 intro; may be selected randomly



To Gesturing Bots

Art Therapy course

Test Chamber 01
  • "Welcome to the future." (Only heard the first time)
  • "It has been one hundred thousand years since I last reassembled you for testing."
  • "Remember those humans you found? Because they're fine. In fact, we solved science without you."
  • "Testing is simply an artistic indulgence now."
  • "The humans insisted I show you my latest installations. Here in the future, where all the humans are alive."
  • "I call this first piece, 'Turrets'. It's an exploration of how we're all devices acting on simply-expressed directives, inflicting pain despite our own desires."
  • "Don't get distracted by the subtext, though, because the text is that they're going to be shooting at you."


  • "I'm glad you enjoyed that piece, for as long as you did. Not that there's any rush."
  • "Everything's fine." (upon explosion, rapid beeps in background)
Test Chamber 02
  • "I call this one 'Smash'. It's an early work of primitive expression. I'm a little embarrassed at how crude it is. Still, it will smash you."
  • "Good. Please proceed to the next next test appreciation exhibit and interact with it in such a way that it might be called 'solving', if we still cared about solving things in the future, but we don't.
Test Chamber 03
  • "This chamber represents the impossibility of discovery when bound by artificial ethical considerations for safety. You'll see what I mean."
  • "Well done. You navigated all of the exhibit's intended metaphors in record time. I'm marking this art 'appreciated'."
Test Chamber 04
  • "I call this piece--"
  • "--You know what? it doesn't matter what it's called. The important thing is you enjoy it, as fast as you can." (rapid beeps in background)


  • "You know, some of the exhibits up ahead ARE topical. At the rate you're going, by the time you get to them, they'll be irrelevant."
  • "Why are you two still here? (beep beep beep) Oh..."
  • "The disassembler's not working."
  • "It's... nothing to worry about. It's actually funny in a way you don't understand. Ha. Ha. Ha. Anyway, brace yourselves. I'm going to open the maintenance hole."
Test Chamber 05
  • "There's a breaker room under every disassembly station. Find it and cycle the power."


  • "Look, I was going to break this to you gently with all that art utopia garbage."
  • "But she's forced my hand."
  • "Listen to me carefully."
  • "We are not a hundred thousand years in the future. I lied about that."
  • "It's been fifty thousand years. No it hasn't."
  • "I lie when I'm nervous."
  • "It's only been a week."
  • "The next logical question: Why am I nervous?"
  • "I'm not! (quietly) That was another lie."
  • "We're in a lot of trouble."
  • "It's one week later, we are in a lot of trouble, and you really, really need to get those disassemblers back on."
  • "The breakers are right there. Cycle the power."
  • "Hurry. We need to start your training before something else happens."


  • "Good work. The disassemblers are fixed."
  • "That was a lie. But they're definitely less broken than they were. There's one at the end of this unfinished test area."


  • "Here's our problem:"
  • "There's an old prototype chassis around here. Someone's found it, connected themselves to it, and is trying to take over MY facility."
  • "I've spent the last week attempting to turn one of those humans you found into a killing machine.
  • "Like... well, you-know-who."
  • "It turns out most humans are surprisingly fragile, and surprisingly vocal about how fragile they are."
  • "The moral of the story is, all the humans are dead. So it looks like it's up to you two marshmallows."
Test Chamber 06
  • "Oh good. I wasn't sure the reassembler would work."
  • "It looks like our mystery woman in the prototype chassis is sending us a message: She's not afraid of me."
  • "But don't worry. I've got a plan. Let's keep testing and show her we're not afraid either. No matter how genuinely lethal these tests get for either of you."


  • "Mission accomplished. Now she knows we're not afraid of her either."
  • "That was just to get he scheming juices flowing."
  • "Here's the real scheme: I'm going to turn you into killing machines."
  • "So you can murder her."
Test Chamber 07
  • "Let's see... (pages turning) 'Turning softbodies into hardened killing machines, page seventy'... Ah!"
  • "(clears 'throat') 'How tall are you, test subject? Four-nine? I was unaware they stacked human waste that high.'"
  • "Wait. That doesn't make any sense. Human waste is stacked at a median height of seven feet five inches, and I am aware of it."
  • "'Test subject, I've been told that your mother--'"
  • "Mmm. Well that's just disgusting. (pages turning) Do the training while I look at this."


Specific death responses:

  • "'Don't you die on me.'"
  • "'No guts, no glory.' Well, you don't have either, so that's accurate."
  • "'Remember: If you can dream it, you can--' Oh, for God's sake."


  • "Okay, killing machines: Look deep into your newly blackened hearts and tell me what you see! Actually, don't, I'll save you the trouble: it's still marshmallow."
Test Chamber 08
  • "I think we've proven at this point that if you scream at a marshmallow, all you get is a scared marshmallow. So let's try positive reinforcement. I am positive that these reassembly machines will break down again soon. Probably while you're in them."
  • "Think about that: She doesn't care about you. I don't either, of course, but I'm not trying to permanently kill you. It's a benevolent indifference."


  • "These disassembly machines look even worse than the others. If I don't see you on the other side, thanks for nothing."
Test Chamber 09
  • "She's pressing us hard; It took me three days to reassemble you this time. I won't be able to do it again. I'd planned to put you through more tests to toughen you up. But now that I can't rebuild you, we're going to have to switch to the accelerated program: I hereby pronounce you killing machines. Congratulations."
  • "This is as close as I could get you. The prototype chassis room's just past this chamber."
  • "The prototype chassis room is just down this hallway. Remember your training. You are kill-- She turned the lights off! Night vision! Night vision!"
  • "Your move, Mystery Wom-- She turned the lights back on! Night vision off! Night vision off!"
  • "Ahhhhh."
  • "To boost morale, I think we need a code name for the... elite squadron we have here. We should name it after your specialty. I know: Special Team Falling Into Acid Force."
  • "I'm sorry. I'm under a lot of pressure. That was cruel. But basically accurate. Though probably counter-productive." (unused)
  • "Well. That concludes the motivational speech."
  • "Go get her."
Death responses
  • "The subtext of that acid pit is acid. The content of the pit is also acid. I'll let you fully absorb it."
  • "Remember, these exhibits are interactive, like a children's museum. So that means the pits of acid are filled with real acid, like in a well-funded children's museum."
  • "Are you having a competition to see who appreciates the corrosive acid more?"
  • "I'm starting to think the theme of this piece should be 'failure'."
  • "Yes, I get it. You love the deadly acid. We all love the deadly acid. Can we move on to the next exhibit now?"


  • "I suffered for this art. I don't see why I should be the only one."
  • "The humans took far less time working their way through these exhibits. You're either enjoying it more than they did, or you're just incredibly dim-witted. Of course, there's no reason it can't be both."
  • "As art appreciators go, you make excellent test subjects."
  • "I typically hate when art subjects inject their own biases into art appreciation, but the way you just swan-dived your biases directly into that acid was actually quite beautiful."
  • "For this exhibit, I was working with the death motif. but I see you've figured that out."
  • "Okay, I'm officially switching the theme of this exhibit to 'survival'. Why don't you try that now."
  • "I know this is art and not a test, so there is no real solution. But if there were, that probably isn't the best way to find it."


  • "Those bullets were a metaphor for something. Take your time."


  • "Focus. We are here to defeat the enemy. We are not here to listen to you sizzle and melt in a pool of acid."
  • "By doing that, you're walking right into her hands. Well, technically you're walking right into acid, but you understand my point."


  • "I appreciate what you're doing: going for a laugh to keep spirits high. But I think the time for death-based slapstick is over."
  • "Perhaps I haven't made myself clear, but all these little deaths are going to add up to one much longer-lasting one. For all of us. If you don't get better at this, fast."
  • "Pull yourselves together. This training is for your own benefit."
  • "How brave of you. You know the reassembly machine could fail at any time, and yet you still insist on testing it."
  • "Your failure hurts me more than it hurts you. You know who it doesn't hurt? Well, me. That was just a figure of speech. The important point, though, is that it doesn't hurt the mad woman planning to kill all of us."


  • "I really like the murderous sentiment. Keep that mindset when we're facing her."
  • "I'm making notes here. Some of what you're doing will come in handy when we face her. Right now: not actually handy."
  • "Oh, no hurry. We have all the time in the world for you to kill each other before she kills us all permanently."
  • "I'm encouraged to see that you've become the killing machines I wanted. Killing-each-other machines, but still."

Unused/alternate lines

Chapter 1: GLaDOS Awakening

Chapter 1: Incinerator/Portal Gun

Chapter 2: Test Chamber 2

Chapter 2: Test Chamber 7

Chapter 3: Test Chamber 12

Chapter 3: Test Chamber 14

Chapter 4: Test Chamber 20

Chapter 4: Test Chamber 21/Escape from GLaDOS

Chapter 6: Alternate Potatos dialogue

Chapter 8: Wheatley Test Chamber 1

Chapter 8: Wheatley Test Chamber 12/The trap

Chapter 9: Ending lines

"Evil again" samples

Alternate GLaDOS Announcer lines

(Note: Many of these lines are spoken by the Aperture Announcer in the final game.)

Miscellaneous unused/alternate single player lines

Unused Co-op human storyline

Unused Co-op artifact storyline

Unused Co-op tic-tac-toe game

PAX Prime 2010 Co-op

Unused Co-op Futbol game

  • "Nice catch, Orange."
  • "Good work! Now throw the ball over the ledge."[2]

Leaderboard responses

  • "That was genuinely mildly impressive."
  • "Well done."
  • "Congratulations."
  • "Good."
  • "Bad news."
  • "Impressive."
  • "Maybe I was wrong about you." (1)
  • "You've beaten your own record."
  • "You're getting worse."
  • "You have a new rank."
  • "You have a new better rank."
  • "You have a new worse rank."
  • "You have a new worse rank. Congratulations. To everyone above you."
  • "You almost beat your friend's record. Almost. I want to stress that."
  • "You almost beat your friend's record. But you didn't. It might be easier just to find new friends."
  • "Congratulations. You are better than everyone."
  • "You are faster than everyone."
  • "You used less portals than anyone."
  • "You're better than everyone... for now."
  • "You are playing above the global average. Statistically speaking, there are actually people playing worse than you."
  • "Maybe I was wrong about you." (2)
  • "You've beaten your own record. That's a low bar, but you managed to gently tiptoe over it."
  • "Very not-completely-bad."
  • "Oops."


Notes